Mixture of feelings...

I'm really not sure how I should feel about the whole event with Adam today.
 
The most obvious feeling I'm sure many people noticed today was being really sad. I'm not sure how many of my friends actually saw that I had been crying right after leaving his room today though. I'm glad no one said anything...but the worst part was to cry in front of him. I seriously can't handle all that he said...worst of all was how much of a disappointment I must have been to him. And I think he really was sincere in his hopes in me.
 
I guess I could say I was touched by it all too... when he said he really wanted to try to guide me through my professional papers in the first sitting, it felt nice. I mean, it must be nice to know that he cares, even past his duties beyond his duties as a university lecturer.
 
Then of course, there's the feeling of relief. I've been reminding myself over and over to tell him how sorry I had been, and now that it's been done, I'm glad I got it past me. Funny he said it didn't matter though, he never did take anything into heart...but it's still a lot of load taken of my chest.
 
Oh, but despite all that crying, one thing did make me happy. He actually commented on me being an objective thinker and furthermore, he thinks that I can understand tax better as compared to Joseph. I mean like... WOW! Oh gosh... it's Joseph we're talking about. He's like all brains. I've always felt that Joseph was like waaaaaayyy up above me. But it doesn't really bother me because I never believed in studying as much as he does, I mean, look at the amount of time he spends in the library. Sorry, but I'm not interested. I don't know if Adam actually meant what he said, but it sure does make me feel a lot better... loads!!!
Hmmm... it does seem to have a bit of deja vu effect on me though. My parents also tell me the same thing (comparing me with my brother that is...). It's like, I don't really get grades as high as he does but still, my parents do think I understand things faster. And I communicate and handle situations better than him... but my biggest flaw (which I believe almost everyone close to me can vouch for) is my laziness. Not that I'm intending to make any drastic changes about that flaw.
 
Oh well, after that was over, the rest of the day isn't so bad...my jeans project which got stalled due to my marker running out of ink was back in progress. My gang had a nice dinner out for a change making full use of my mum's car. Although I'm not exactly that keen on spending 10 bucks for dinner (we accounting students have the right to be stingy... it's in our nature) but all's fine by the end of the day =)
 
Mood : Very eager to get back to my jeans, better to make some progress now before I drag myself to work on the AIS assignment.